Recently I, finally, started to enclose the hot tub (I will write an article on how to rebuild a hot tub from a unit that has been dragged backwards through a hedge and is in pieces as soon as I know how to do it myself) after it has sat in our garden for the last 2 years.

This has had the effect of killing much of the meadow that we planted (as it was trampled under foot), and of leaving very little land for growing things other than the meadow. I recently got a Kiwi Issai and wanted somewhere sunny to plant it. Sadly the only sunny part of the garden is the trellis on top of the left hand fence, which is also 6 ish foot off the ground. I decided that what I would do is use the hot tub frame as the point from where I would start growing the Kiwi, with the hope that this would give it a head start. Then once it has grown along the fence a bit I would get it to grow down into the garden elsewhere (there is a tiny corner of soil wedged between our sewer access hatch and my neighbours patio) and then start growing it in earnest from there.

OK so hopelessly complex, but here are some photos of the arrangement. The drain pipe will be behind a cover in the hot tub (once I’ve built it) and goes down to the ground where I hope the roots of the Issai will eventually reach. It has to be watered with the highly complex drip-irrigation system I developed (a fizzy bottle with a little hole in the bottom), and fed with an artificial (store-bought) plant food rather than natural home-made compost.

Hopefully I won’t kill it (it required some serious manhandling to cram the roots into the pipe).